Showing posts with label Struggle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Struggle. Show all posts

What to Do When You’re Alone at the End of Your Rope

~~ 1 Kings 19:4 (NIV) ~~  while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.




Houses on cliffs in Málaga
Microsoft Office Copyright Free Images
Feeling exhausted from the constant struggle to hold on?  Every member of our human species knows the feeling of being completely drained physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  Often, to make matters worse, those you need the most, when you need them the most, don’t seem to be there for you.  You’re hanging onto the knot at the end of a rope over a very high cliff.  You can see and hear the huge ocean-waves crashing against the jagged rocks below.  Your energy has run out, you’re alone, and your screams for help go unheard while your rope is fraying away smaller and smaller every minute.  Being at your wits end makes you want to give up, quit, and say “I’m done.”  This is how so many are filled with so much pain that they want to die.

On February 15th of this year, a trauma sent me into a big tailspin.  My Bipolar infested brain hasn’t stopped spinning since.  I’m feeling alone, rejected, and harshly judged.  Though I didn’t have a relationship with God 20 years ago, I remember being at the end of my rope several times and telling Him I was hanging on by the tiniest of threads.  Here I am all these years later holding on to another fraying rope, and continuing to struggle with it.  Just like I know you are feeling, I’m tired of it.  I want it to stop.  How do we make that happen?

Stop Struggling :  to Rebuild Your Strength
Our human solutions to problems vary as much as the people.  The biggest problem is that our solutions are not usually good ones.  My answers, too often; are to cry, scream, throw a tantrum, or tell someone off.  Truthfully, I’m tired of crying.  On a side note, I do find that crying helps a lot; though apparently I’m in the minority about that.  It fascinates me, actually, that one body has so much water in it.  Of course, being on a healthy living path, I drink enough water that I’m surprised I don’t need oars to keep going every day.  In my past, there was a long time when I hurt so badly I asked God, on a daily basis, to take me out of this world.  I was tired of the pain and I had no desire or strength to deal with any more of it.    

I’ve been reading the story of Elijah in the bible.  I can relate to him so very much.  After he went on the run from the tyrant rage of Queen Jezebel who wanted to execute him, he ended up n the desert; depressed, alone, hungry, with nowhere to turn, and a band of killers on his tail.  He was so drained he wanted to die; and asked God to let it happen (1 Kings 19:4).

Be Still: to Hear God’s Voice
God responded to Elijah just as He always has with me.  God took care of his needs by feeding him and making sure he got some rest.  Elijah finally heard God’s voice in a “gentle whisper” (1 Kings 19:12)

As I look back, I can see that God has never left me hanging when my energy was gone.  He has given me food when I didn’t have money to buy it; rest when I didn’t know how to stop running; counseling when I didn’t have anyone else to talk to; a place to live when I didn’t have anywhere else to go; relationships when I didn’t have any friends; a church when I felt lost without a focus, and so much more.  Every time I need encouragement and I can’t reach out for it, or I don’t know how; God sends it to me.  Sometimes, it’s in the form of a daily devotional that pops up in one of my books or my email.  Other times, a friend will call out of the blue, drop by, or pop up on Skype

Once our physical needs are met, and we’re calmed down; we can hear God’s reassuring voice.

He Will Lift You Up
When you feel like you’re at the end of your rope, it’s then that you need to calm down.  I know it is so very hard to do this.  To relax and not worry when you’re life could be on the line; it doesn’t make sense.  But stop struggling; let Him lift you from your place way above the rocks, back onto the safety of solid ground.  Once the wind stops blowing, the rocks stop falling, and the waves stop crashing; you will hear His voice telling you what to do next.  If you’re not sure if you’re hearing from Him, or what He is saying, just quietly worship Him.  The more you worship, the clearer your heart will hear Him.  If You can’t sleep, listen to worship music.  If you’re confused, read the Word.  If you feel useless or unproductive, encourage someone else. 

God took care of Elijah, directed him, and showed him that he wasn’t alone.  Trust Him, and He will do the same for you. 

Let’s Pray
 ~~ Dear God ~~  You come to my rescue every single time, no matter how many times I need rescuing.  Thank You so much for never giving up on me.  In Jesus name, AMEN.

Now It's Your Turn
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Bubbles and Peace

~~ Romans 15:13 (NIV84) ~~  May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.



by Carley Cooper

Microsoft Office Copyright Free Images
There’s a married couple that I know that has a great story of how he led her to Christ.  As they tell it, when they started dating he was already a Christian who was totally in love with Jesus.  She saw a happiness and peace inside him, and decided almost right away “I want what he has”.  I’ve often thought about that since I first heard them tell that story.  It reminds me of days gone by in my own history.  There was a time when I felt happy and at peace.  I dated several guys during that time and they all told me the same thing; that they fell in love with me because I was “bubbly”.  It fascinated me that each one used that same word, not knowing what the others had said.  Over the years I’ve often wondered where that bubbly young spirit disappeared to?  Somewhere along the line, the bubbles were popped. 

What is it that you want others to see in you?  Have you ever really thought about it?  When it comes to other people, I think what I want most is for someone to see that bubbly nature, but I also want them to see the peace of the Holy Spirit.  Since I have come to understand and feel that I have a relationship with Jesus, I have come to know that peace.  I have a 2012 calendar on my wall and the page for March quotes John 14: 27My peace I give to you.”  It also says “Inner Peace – Nothing can disturb the calm peace of my soul.”  I know that feeling of peace, and I know that others have seen it in me.  Last year, despite a few rough patches, was a great year for me in regards to feeling God’s peace within me.  It was the first time in many years that I felt that calm.  I knew God was telling me that my bubbly character was emerging because I had a couple of people mention it to me.  Again, they used that word, bubbly, not knowing what others before them had said.  Only this time it was even better because I’m ‘bubbly’ for the Lord.  Another time, one of the pastors at church said to me one day that I had a certain peace about me that he liked.  As I walked into church one Sunday morning, about to take my seat, a woman said to me “Wow, look at you.  You’re radiant!”  Now that’s an awesome word, 'radiant!'  God was confirming to me that I am changing.  My heart is being molded by Him slowly.  My true nature is coming back.    

In recent weeks I have been in the midst of a struggle.  Of course we know that these struggles are vital if we are to get closer to God.  Hopefully it is one that I am learning from; that is helping me get closer to Him.  Part of me feels like my bubbles have burst again.  That calm has been upset.  It has left me, at times, with the most uncomfortable feeling of coldness.  After knowing the warmth and peace of the Holy Spirit, to go through an emotional experience where God feels far away has left me with an overwhelming feeling of emptiness.  I know, that God is not actually far away because He never leaves us.  Deuteronomy 31:6 (NIV84) says “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”  This struggle has taught me that if I’m feeling far from God it’s because I’m not letting Him in.  In my quiet times with Him, He’s been telling me to “lay it at the cross”.  I have a sun catcher that hangs in my window that says “Let God & Let God”.  I have to do that.  Without it, the peace is impossible. 

Truthfully, I miss that bubbly spirit so very much.  I often look in the mirror and long for her to look back at me again.  There’s one big difference though between that bubbly young girl of my youth, and the woman I am now.  That is, Jesus.  I didn’t know Him then.  I knew OF Him, but I didn’t have a relationship with Him.  For that matter, I didn’t know I could.  As much as I want to be that bubbly person again, I don’t want it if it means being without Jesus, like I was so long ago.  The cold, empty feeling that I’ve had because of my tail spin is something I don’t like.  It is the most painful feeling in the world to me now.  It is worse than the rejection by others ever was or could be.  Things are getting better on a daily basis.  All through the month of March, every day I would look at my calendar and be reminded that I have God’s assurance of peace within me and no one can break it or take it away from me.  It was an incredible comfort to me.  I am learning from this experience, and I am growing.  Some days that’s easier to see than other days, but God has given me a stubborn nature to never give up.  In this case, it has been a blessing because it assures me that I will bounce back.  I always do.  

What do I want others to see in me?  Bubbles and peace for certain, which can be summed up in one word; Jesus!
         



~~ Dear God ~~  The journey You take us on to get closer to You, and to become more like Jesus is filled with struggles.  Thank You Lord, for these struggles.  Without them I would not be growing stronger and closer to You each day.  Without them I would not be learning the value in knowing Your peace in my life.  Please help me to grow to be that bubbly personality filled with the peace of the Holy Spirit that allows people to say “I want what she has”.  In Jesus name, AMEN.



Finding the Silver Lining

~~ Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV84)~~   Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.



by Carley Cooper

My dog, Casey is afraid of Chicklet, our lovebird.
Casey: "Mommyyyy. It's gonna hurt me. Help!"

Photo by Carley
Are you a ‘glass half full’ or a ‘half empty’ kind of person?  Do your clouds have silver linings?  Everyone in this world has to struggle and go through hard times.  It is how we were designed to learn.  Sometimes learning that is, in itself, one of those struggles that must be overcome.  Every struggle, battle, and side trip is a lesson or a series of lessons to be learned.  If we are not paying attention we can miss some very important signs that are meant to guide us on our journey.  Of course, this applies to the good times as well.  Even if you have a very difficult time seeing the bright side, you need to be creative enough to turn it into a usable lesson.

This concept reminds me of a lesson in my Interior Decorating studies many years ago.  Almost every house has some sort of niche that you wish was not there.  Surely your house has some sort of odd corner, alcove, or unusual shape to a room that seems to prevent proper furniture placement.  As decorators we are taught to turn this into a positive thing.  Use it to create an attractive feature that you could not have without it.  Another example is from my healthy living program.  There are so many people trying to lose weight and maintain a healthy lifestyle.  Many times I have read blogs by these individuals listing, for example, “75 Things I Learned from my 75 Pound Weight-loss”.  People are finding unexpected blessings in their times of trial.

One of these struggles for me has been my battle with Bipolar Disorder.  Sharing my story is something that I like to do because, like sharing weight-loss stories, it is encouraging to others giving them hope, as well as a reminder to myself about how far I have come.  Battling with this health issue has taught me a great many things.  A few of these things are:
  • I have learned that I am never, ever to give up.  Do not quit and you will not be a failure.
  • I have learned more details about the disease than I ever thought I wanted to know (symptoms, characteristics, treatments, etc.).
  • I have learned that I am not alone.  There are many people out there suffering in the same way.
  • I have learned that no matter how severe my depression episode should happen to be... I know that my mood will be going up very soon.  I also believe that one day, in God’s timing, my mood will go up for the last time.  There will be a day when I will no longer hit a rock-bottom depressive episode.  I believe the day is coming in my future when I will no longer be Bipolar.  A special friend once said to me “It is when things look impossible, that God does His best miracles”... but the key is that you have to have faith in Him.  You have to repent from your sins and let God mould your heart to be like that of Jesus. 
  • I have learned (thanks in part to my healthy living journey) that there are certain foods that can trigger bad episodes in me.  I know what foods I am to stay away from; what foods contribute toward keeping me from going into a severe depressive episode or a severe mania period; and how to strive for a healthy lifestyle.
  • As a result, I have also learned a huge amount of nutritional information.
  • I have learned the importance of regular exercise for my mental health.
  • I have learned just how much of a gift that music (especially Worship Music) can be.  Many days music is the wall that keeps me from falling into depression.
  • I have talked about my battle with Bipolar before in an earlier blog entitled “The Truth”.  I have learned, as I said in this previous article, that Bipolar is “not a choice, a sin, a crime, a weakness, or a character flaw”.
  • I have learned that mental illness is not something to be embarrassed about, afraid or ashamed of. 
  • Through some amazing therapy and recovery programs offered in the area where I live, I am being taught how to “reprogram my brain” by learning how to change my thinking.  As a result, I have learned that:
    • Bipolar does not mean that I am broken. 
    • It is not my fault.
    • I am not crazy.
    • I am not bad.
    • I am trustworthy.
    • I am loveable.
    • I am good enough.
    • I belong.
    • I am worthy.
  • I have learned that the stigma placed on me is not who I am.  Those negative beliefs by others are false, uneducated, shameful, and fearful; and are not connected to the truth.  I was told once that “you do not know how to count your blessings, because if you did then you would not be depressed”.   This kind of uneducated lie from the enemy is exactly the kind of stigma that the public needs to be educated about.  More and more, science is proving that mental illness is indeed a physical disease.  It is caused by chemical and hormone imbalances, and personally, I believe; also from chemicals, preservatives and artificial sweeteners in our over-processed food supply.  Those of us, who suffer from mental illness, have known this for years because often the physical symptoms show up before the emotional symptoms.
  • I know that judging others by their appearance; or rather by their Bipolar, is about as efficient as judging a book by its cover.
  • I have learned to reach out for help and support when I need it.
  • I have learned that I am incredibly strong.  I am stronger than I ever would have thought I could be.  I have to be or it would be impossible to survive this; especially considering that I am doing it as a single woman living alone.  With all the wonderful support I get from family, friends, counsellors, church family, and my medical-care team; when I am at home, I am alone.  If I cannot care for myself, than who will?  Thankfully, I am a child of God and He has sent Jesus, to take care of me.
  • Depression is the place the enemy wants many of us to stay; even those without Bipolar.  I have learned that this place is a glimpse of just how dark and scary the world would be without God.  I have learned that I do not ever want to go there.
With all these points mentioned, I believe that the biggest lesson I have learned is that I need to turn to God whether I am at the bottom or at the top.  I cannot get back up out of the pit of depression, or come down from a mania period, or stay supported and stable at a healthy level in between; without Him.  No matter what level I am on, I need Him.  Whether you are going through a stressful period or a happy period, listen to God’s voice.  He is trying to teach you something.  God has designed every struggle to bring us closer to Him and to teach us how to lean on Him.  Look for the silver lining in each and every cloud.  After all, no matter what kind of mess you are in right now, there could be much scarier things chasing you!

(I welcome you to share your stories with me in the comment section below.  I would love to hear them.)



~~ Dear God ~~ Your ways and Your understanding is beyond anything that I can comprehend.  They are perfect.  No path I can choose, no solution I can apply is as perfect as those that You have already set in place for me.  I thank You for leading me closer to You with each and every day; and for moulding my heart to be like that of Jesus.  Open my heart, mind, eyes and ears to receive the message of love that You are sending me.  Please make me willing and able to receive that message, and give me opportunities to share it with others.  Help me to see the silver lining in every cloud, and use me to teach others about mental illness.  In Jesus name, AMEN.



Cherokee

~~Romans 12:21~~ (NLT) Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good.



Aboriginal First Nations Tee Pee at Circle Square Ranch in Mountain Grove Ontario. Photo Property of Carla Cooper and / or Worship Melodies. All copyrights claimed
Photo by Carley
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life.  "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.  "It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.  One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.  The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.  This same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."  The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"  The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

I like stories like this one about the old Cherokee.  Someone sent that one to me in an email.  Such tales are good food for thought. 

It is as old as the world itself; the fight of good versus evil.  The very first people God ever created ended up in a mess with sin almost from day one.  Have you ever wondered what the world would be like now, who you would be, what your life would be like today if Eve did not eat that apple?  That is, assuming it was an apple.  The bible does not tell us what type of fruit it was; but that could be a subject for another blog.  Why couldn’t Eve decide to snack on oranges or grapes that day?  Did it really have to be an apple after God clearly said “No” to the apple tree?

No person has ever been able to avoid the battle with Satan and his demonic entourage.  (Romans 3:23)  It is in our nature to want to be sinful.  There is something that we find exciting in temptation.  We want what we cannot have, and have a desire to break the rules just because we can.  (Ephesians 2:3)  He gave us free will to choose, yet we always want to choose what is not good for us.  Even after we have learned a lesson, we still choose sin.  Why is that?

God allows us to go through these battles to teach us.  Without these conflicts we could not possibly know what good is.  If you never had a stormy day, how would you know just how great a sunny day really is?  If you gave your child everything s/he wanted the child would never learn that some things are bad.  It is the very nature of the struggle itself that gives us the opportunity to learn; and to build strength, character, courage, love, hope, humility and faith.  If you never had your heart broken, how would you know and appreciate a great love when you found it?  How would we know just how glorious God’s love is for us?  That, after all, is the point... to be conformed to the likeness of Jesus so we can get closer to God. 
 
Grapes and grapevine. Photo property of Carla Cooper and / or Worship Melodies. All copyrights claimed
Photo by Carley
So it seems that Eve did have to eat the apple that day.  Without it, she, and therefore us, would never understand just how great God’s love is for us.  It is only by being apart from Him, through sin, that we can realize how vast His love and mercy for us really is.  At some point though we have to stop choosing what is not good for us.  We have to feed the ‘good wolf’.  We have to start choosing God.  Listen to that old Cherokee and his great wisdom.




 


~~Dear God~~ Show me when I am about to choose to feed the bad wolf.  Please give me the desire to always do Your will, and do not let a single lesson that I learn from You be lost.  In Jesus name, AMEN.  




Small Steps - Are they Really?

~~ Romans 5:3-5 ~~ Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.


Spread Eagle, Newfoundland, Canada. Photo property of Carla Cooper and / or Worship Melodies. All copyrights claimed
Photo by Carley (Spread Eagle, Newfoundland, Canada)

There is an old Chinese proverb that says ‘a journey of a thousand miles begins with one small step’.  When was the last time you took a trip?  Was it a trip that you were looking forward to for quite some time, or a last minute decision?  The plans for your journey may have all fallen together in a half hour, or they could have taken months to put together.  Either way it was a planned trip!  Almost everything in life has some type of plan before it can happen. 

Part of my journey has taken me through weight loss.  This is hardly unique these days.  It is a big problem, no pun intended; yet at the same time, when you look at it; it's all common sense!  You put healthy stuff in; you’re going to get healthy stuff coming back!  As part of the program that I used, I have been well educated on the importance of setting small goals.  It teaches us that we are not initially out to lose 50 lbs, or 100 lbs or more.  In fact, we are out to lose 10, or maybe even 5!  Then, and only then, when that's gone; we are set out to lose another 5 or 10 and so on!  We are well taught that small steps are important; and so is not 'biting off more than you can chew', being patient, not giving up when you have set backs (which you will), and rewarding yourself at each goal achieved.  Working hard and relentlessly continuing to push forward and you will get results! 

Motivation is the key, and if you are lacking in that, then nothing works better than prayer, asking God to give you that motivation.  You need to have a vision in mind of the goal that you want to achieve!  Whatever your circumstances for being overweight, be sure it is there for a reason.  When you find a goal that is truly more important than your reasons for being overweight, then you will have the motivation you need to lose the unwanted pounds.  If you are not progressing, than what you think is more important is not really.  If it were than you would be succeeding.  So if you are trying to lose weight because you ‘want to be alive for your family’, but you are not making much progress in your weight loss, than you really have to do some deep soul searching, or get counselling, to find out ‘why not?’.  Weight loss is all about the psychological issues more than the physical.   Overall, it is a small percentage of people who are overweight for medical reasons over psychological reasons.  If there is anything about your reasons for being there or your lack of motivation that you do not understand you need to pray about it; and get counselling if necessary!

These important lessons about weight loss, I have found can be applied to other areas of my life as well.  I am learning so much about how to be a strong, capable, independent person.  This weight-loss program has changed me in more ways than just the physical.

Christmas 1992 I was in a major auto accident that changed my life.  I was the passenger in a car with my (then) fiancé on an icy highway in central Ontario.  It was Boxing Day (in Canada that is December 26th, the day after Christmas).  We were on our way north to visit his family for the remainder of the holiday season.  It is a trip that typically took us 3 hours.  On this particular day we were about half way there when we drove around a large turn in the road, and suddenly we in the midst of a 6 car pile-up.  They had to use the jaws-of-life to cut us out.  The rescue team told us that we were extremely lucky for many reasons, but one reason being that our car was a rag-top convertible.  Though our car was totalled, it was strong enough to protect us from being crushed.  If it was not for the grace of God and that well built vehicle I would not be sitting here typing this to you right now.  In the emergency room later that evening, my fiancé said to me “Now you know why that road is called The Highway to Heaven”.  I said to him “Oh great, so now you tell me!”.

My life changed in so many ways that day. I could, literally, write a book on the spin-off that affects my life to this day.  For months after I was almost completely bedridden.  I was able to get up and about but it would take quite a while and I needed help to do so.  Getting to the bathroom alone or putting my clothes on without help was impossible for weeks after the accident.  It took a long time for me to recover.  I remember the day that I finally went to the bathroom alone.  Then I came out and walked toward my bed, sat down on the edge and put my own clothes on… by myself!  It took me quite some time to achieve all this… but I did it!  Just me, with no help from anyone!  I truly and honestly felt like I could conquer the world.  I sat there alone, crying with joy and said out loud “look out world. I am back and there’s no stopping me now”.  I called everyone I could think of to tell them how excited I was.  I got responses that raged from “Yea, Ok… good for you” with a tone of “so what?” to “Yea OK… good for you” with a tone of “I’m so proud of you and so happy for you”; to a sarcastic “some of us have been doing that for quite some time now”.  Yea, I know there’s always the comedian in the bunch, especially in my family!

My point is that it was a small thing in my life, yet it was not!  It was huge because it got me one more step further along!  Just like each pound lost on my weight-loss journey,  it is a big deal!  There are no small achievements.  Each step is important to changing the whole you and to getting yourself closer to your destination!  Weight loss is not just about changing your body shape, your weight, or your clothing size.  It’s about changing who you are on the inside.  There is only one right way to change you and it has to be done in 3 parts; body, mind, and spirit!  If you do not complete all 3 parts, or if you do a flimsy job on anyone of the 3, than the whole package will not be complete or have strength.  You need to set your goals.  You need to know the steps to achieve them, and the route you need to take to get there!  If you do not know some of this information than you need to reach out to someone who can guide you in the right steps.  That is what I did, and continue to do, each time I reached a road block or a fork in the road.  Learning to reach out was a road block in itself for me.  I have finally learned that reaching out to others is not a weakness and it does not mean that I am not smart enough.  My support system is vital to my progress; which in itself was also a step to be achieved; something I had to build. 

We could have gone a different route for that trip north on Boxing Day 1992, but we did not because it would take an extra hour.  Being a snowy Ontario winter day we did not want to be driving any longer than necessary.  But, guess what?  For an extra hour, my whole life would, likely, have turned out completely different!  My lessons were these: Know what you want, do not be afraid of hard work, or how much time it takes to get there; and never, ever pay attention to the negative people that will try to make you feel bad, tell you lies or hold you back.  

Recently there was something that made me feel like I just passed an important mile marker.  It was a small step, yet a big turn in the road for me.  I have a friend that has blessed me more than I deserve to get from one person.  However, he has also hurt me more times than I can count.  No matter how many times people let you down, it never gets easier.  I have shed way more tears over one person than he should ever have gotten from me.  Letting go of this weight, I have come to see in the midst of my tears, is vital if I am to continue.  It can only be done through forgiveness... of myself as much as him.  I have come to realize that I have to let go of a very big weight that is keeping me anchored in the past.  Life goes on and I will survive and be OK because God never leaves me, even for an instant!  Despite the hurt, my friend will forever be in my heart, and will forever be a vital person in the progress of my journey thus far.  He was a stop along the way where I have gathered some important things to take with me.  Things like perseverance, character, hope, faith, forgiveness, determination, and strength.  I have also unloaded some unwanted things.  Items such as anger, hatred, fear, shame, hurt, hopelessness, and guilt. 

So, my goals for the next day or two… is to get through my next dentist appointment, to get the mountain of laundry done that has piled up, and to spend extra quiet time with God as to recover from the last big pothole that got in the way.  Look out world, here I come!  It’s all a matter of perspective; which in itself, for me, was something else I had to learn along the way.  Who is to say what is truly a small step, or what is a big one when each step in the right direction will get you closer to God?  For directions you will not need a map.  All you will need is your Bible.  I will continue to keep my focus looking ahead to God because I never know when just around the next bend God will have my greatest blessings waiting for me.



~~Dear God~~ I pray that You will never let me leave the path that You have laid out for me.  Let each and every step be taken forward, toward You.  Do not let any road block, pot hole, or pit stop be wasted.  Use each and every one to bring blessings to me and glory to Your name.  I thank You, Father, for this wonderful journey that You have chosen for me no matter how difficult it is for me.  In Jesus name, AMEN.