Who Really Suffers the Most?

James 1:2-4 (NIV) ~~ Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.


by Carley Coopersuffering-suffering

I read a status message online the other day that said:

God only puts us through as much as we can handle, so the people who struggle the most have been chosen to be the strongest ones.” 

My first thought when I saw this message was “There it is again; someone else who thinks that they’ve suffered more.”  Which, in my mind, means they believe my trials weren’t as hard for me to go through as theirs were for them.  People seem to want to make it clear to others that they, themselves, have suffered so much that no one else could possibly understand.  Personally, I find that to be an insult. 

My Burdens Make Me Strong

It really started me thinking about all the burdens I’ve had to carry in my lifetime.  Am I one of the strong ones?  Or maybe, despite all that I’ve been through in my lifetime with abuse, physical and mental health issues (just to name a few) it’s not actually a big enough load to consider me as being one of the tough people.  

How does my load compare, really, to others?  Who gets to measure what is “a lot” compared to “not as much” or “a little”?  And, why does it matter anyway?  Do I have the right to say “I’ve suffered more than you”, or “I can see that Jim has suffered more than Bob”?  Where in the bible does it say that God only puts us through as much as we can handle?  Does God’s Word say that the ones who struggle the “most” are the strongest ones?   

God Loves You Too

Who are we to compare one person’s burdens to another?  God created us for HIS purpose.  That purpose in one life may be a short and difficult life.  Does it mean lives that were ended prematurely didn’t struggle as hard just because they were short; that they never got a chance to be one of the strong ones?   

We can't compare ourselves to someone else like that.  We need to try to understand the magnitude of God's love for us.  He loves us so much that He sent Jesus to die for us in order that we could be forgiven.

It’s not a competition peeps.  Even when it may appear that someone has suffered more / less than you, doesn’t make it true.  Your load may have been bigger, but that doesn’t mean you’ve suffered more.  One person’s load, if it could be given to someone else, may not feel the same weight on someone else’s shoulders.  What’s hard for me to handle may not be hard for you; and visa versa.  To say that one person has suffered more is like comparing apples and oranges, chalk and cheese, or dogs and cats!  You just can’t make them equal, because they are completely different. 

Only God Knows For Sure

The bible doesn’t tell us that God only gives us the burdens we can carry, and no more.  Where’s the suffering in that?  It says that He only gives us temptations that we are able to resist, if we really wanted to.  1 Corinthians 10:13 says:

No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

I urge you, friends, to think about others before making a judgement on how much they’ve suffered.  We don’t know what their journey is all about, or all that’s involved.  Only God knows that.  The important thing to remember is that we all have to suffer in this world.  No one escapes without going through some trials.  They are necessary to build our faith so we become mature and complete, get blessings, and get close to God.

Let’s Pray

Dear God ~~ Thank You merciful and loving Father for all Your blessings.  We try to compete with each other in such ridiculous ways sometimes.  Thank You for helping us to become more like Jesus every day through our trials and traumas.  Please help us to remember that we do not have to compete for Your love.  You love each and every one of us in our own special way.  Thank You for that.   In Jesus name, I pray.  AMEN.

Now It’s Your Turn

Thoughts?  Questions?  Want to share your story?  Ask for prayer? Please share in the comments section.

(If you’re on the homepage, click on the post headline, & scroll down to find the comments section.)

Check out these other great options and join in the conversations...

Carley Cooper on Facebook Carley Cooper on Twitter Carley Cooper on YouTube

35 comments :

  1. Good day! I could have sworn I've been to this blog before but after browsing through
    some of the post I realized it's new to me. Nonetheless,
    I'm definitely delighted I found it and I'll be bookmarking and checking back often!


    Check out my web blog iherb coupon codes

    ReplyDelete
  2. My hardest struggle coming from a warld inside like a dream completely repressed into the unreal Learn who I was What I believed What I wanted Toke 10 years

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for reading and for your reply. I really appreciate it. Thank you also for sharing. Many blessings to you. HUGS

      Delete
  3. OBSIDIANFIREFebruary 13, 2014

    reminds me of the Sunday School story I learned years ago about the man who thought his cross was too much to bear...Jesus took him to a room full of crosses so he could pick out a new one.....the man looked and looked and finally picked the smallest one, whereupon Jesus told him he'd just picked out his own cross......
    I can't remember the story "exactly" but you get the idea.....
    Embrace your weaknesses and find ways to turn them into strengths.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for reading and for your reply. I really appreciate it. Thank you also for sharing. I know the story you're talking about. I've heard it before myself. Many blessings to you. HUGS

      Delete
  4. I found this interesting. I have always pondered this scripture.

    I guess I decided that no mater what I am going through, that God will give me the strength to endure and overcome and come through victorious, in the end. In the midst of a trial or tempation, it is hard to understand, but I guess the best thing to do is Stand and Pray.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for reading and for your reply. I really appreciate it. Thank you also for sharing. Many blessings to you. HUGS

      Delete
  5. I think there are a couple of us who struggle most - those who have been chosen as being strong and capable and those who refuse to accept the will of God and thus struggle instead of accepting His will, His love, and His guidance.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for reading and for your reply. I really appreciate it. Many blessings to you. HUGS

      Delete
    2. I agree. Some of our struggles are due to the fact we need to be chastised. Other struggles make us strong and strengthen our faith. Both kinds can make us more Christlike, if we accept God's will for us. He deals with us severally as He will, and to compare ourselves to one another is also foolish. Good message! Thank you.

      Delete
    3. Thank you for reading and for your reply. I really appreciate it. Many blessings to you. HUGS

      Delete
  6. Carley, I haven't finished reading what you've written yet but this is important to me...
    We definitely agree concerning the following.........

    Who are we to compare one person's burdens with another? Even if we're very close to the person, do we really know what they've been through? There are some things people won't talk about and those things not spoken can hurt an awfully lot.

    Now I'm going back to read the rest of the message. Thanks Carley. Hugs, Darlene

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so very much. I agree with you totally. Your point of view is exactly the point of my article. Thanks. Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  7. Very frankly, since none of us really know what someone else has gone through or is going through, we can't judge whether we have suffered more or less than someone else. In the long run, we will be individuals still and if we do believe in Jesus, that is the main thing. I do know I have learned several things in my life from my various experiences.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so very much. I agree with you totally. Thanks for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it very much. Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  8. That is a very interesting thought. I didn't ever think of it this way. I know that when we feel really low and overburdened, that is when Christ is holding us and is waiting for us to ask Him for help.

    Every person goes through different trials and tribulations. It is up to US to decide to ask God for assistance and love. There is no competition, everyone has things to go through. God loves us and wants us to persevere and follow His word and seek Him. He wants us to become closer to Him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so very much. I agree with you totally. Thanks for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it very much. Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  9. I wrote a whole conference on this and I don't believe that statement is biblical. The apostle Paul went through so much he despaired even of his life. God gives us MORE than we can handle, so He can show Himself mighty and true and faithful. If we can handle everything, then we don't need God. "My strength is made perfect in weakness".
    I believe that statement they refer to really deals with temptation, not with issues in our lives.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so very much. I agree with you totally. Thanks for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it very much. Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  10. Varley, another good one! In the passage you used from James, it didn't even mention strength. Our trials give us perseverance, maturity and holiness. 2 Cor 12:9 tells us that His strength is perfected in our weakness. Our trials, as we respond in a godly manner, draws us closer to Him so we can rely on His strength.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for reading and for your reply. I really appreciate it. Many blessings to you. HUGS

      Delete
  11. Carley,
    You really had some good points. That status thing does seem a little off. That person probably didn't mean it to sound that way. But, it does. Another problem I see with this issue is that a hurting person could see this and think their concerns weren't worthy enough.
    Cheri

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the reading, and for the feedback. I really appreciate it very much! You make a good point. I will pray that those who see it will not be misled by any messages that were written. Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  12. Awesome Blog. Thank You very much for it. God Blessings Always. Have a Wonderful Week. Elaine.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the reading, and for the feedback. I really appreciate it very much! Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  13. No one wants trials and suffering, but with God in our life,we can become stronger.
    Hugs

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the reading, and for the feedback. I really appreciate it very much! Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  14. GODSCHILDAMYBFebruary 15, 2014

    That is a good question Carley! It always seems like we suffer more then another until another's struggle is brought to light! God said He would never give us more then we can bare. He also said that He would carry our burden. So by carrying something may make us stronger, it may not be so necessary to carry it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the reading, and for the feedback. I really appreciate it very much! Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  15. Carley, another great thinking project! I totally agree with you that each one of us has our own struggles and none is easier or harder than another because we are such individuals. It's like I tell people that "pain is pain". It doesn't matter if yours seems harder or easier to me. Or if someone says they've had a good life compared to mine. We all hurt at times and it's very real. We do not need to compare ourselves to one another. We need to concentrate on the love our God has for us as individuals and give it back to Him by living our lives as an example. If we've gone thru pain and can help someone else because of it then I believe that is what God wants us to do.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the reading, and for the feedback. I really appreciate it very much! Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  16. I choose to worship and give myself away to the trials and tribulations of the world as mine if the Kingdom of Heaven!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for the reading, and for the feedback. I really appreciate it very much! Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete
  17. This is igniteme101. I loved it~ Many People try so hard not to feel sorry for me with what I've suffered through. Yet, I know it was God's mercy that I might find my way to Him! Others are condescending and still others run because they don't want to believe things like 'this' happen to nice people. I believe God sees the end of the book. We win!


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Del'jean for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much. I hope you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUG

      Delete