How Do You Pay Others Back?

1 Peter 3:9 (NIV) - Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.


by Carley CooperMan and woman shaking hands isolated on a white background.

It’s a regular day in your life.  No, on second thought it’s better than regular.  You’re having a great day.  Everything is falling into place.  Your teenagers got up and got off to school without any squabbling about who gets the bathroom first.  Your spouse got off to work with a promise to be home for a nice family dinner together.  Your boss, called you in to give you praise, and a bonus, for a job well done on your last big project.  Even the weather is cooperating with a beautiful blue sky filled with sunshine all day. 

Life is Wonderful Today!

That is, until you’re on your way home from work.  You’re driving along minding your own business when some guy pulls out in front of you without looking.  He cuts you off and you miss hitting him by mere inches.  This kind of thing makes you angry.  What was he thinking?  Doesn’t he know the rules of the road?  Someone should teach him to drive so he doesn’t put others in danger!  You yell at him and shake your fist, even though he can’t hear you from inside the car.  Then again, some people might even open their window or get out and yell at the guy.  Road rage has kicked in.  You almost had the perfect day; until one person had to ruin it for you. But you told him!  You’re proud of yourself.  He won’t mess with you anymore.

Evil + Evil Does Not = Blessings

Maybe you don’t get road rage.  Maybe you react in other situations though.  How would you react in some of these situations?:

  • You see a Facebook status that you don't like, is embarrassing or hurtful to you or someone you love?
  • You get overcharged in a store?
  • You get a telemarketing sales call?
  • Someone does / says something to hurt you, or betray you or someone you love?
  • Your boss asks you to work overtime when you have other plans?
  • Your neighbours are playing their music too loud?
  • Someone embarrasses or humiliates you in public?

I bet there’s at least one of those situations that would get your back arched up.  You would want to get back at the other person by telling yourself that you’re just defending yourself or your loved ones.  Or, maybe you wouldn’t react in public.  Maybe you would feel enraged and just imagine what you would like to do or say to that other person.

Well, guess What?!  You may be proud of yourself, but God is not proud of you in situations when you don’t respond how He wants you to.

God Wants to Give You Blessings

God can’t give us blessings if we repay evil with evil.  That’s not at all how we are to react to upsetting situations with other people.  1 Peter 3:9 says “Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.” 

I know what you’re thinking.  “What?  You mean God wants me to be nice to a guy who just nearly killed me?

In a word… YES!  The correct response would have been to be nice to the man.  In situations like that we are to bless the other person.  I know you can’t imagine wishing someone blessings in a situation like that, but try it.  Even if the other driver can’t hear you, say “God please richly bless that person.” (and mean it!)  I think you will find that you feel much better afterward.  Not only that but you’ll start seeing more blessings happening in your own life. 

So next time you’re in a sticky situation with someone else, how are you going to pay them back?

Let’s Pray

Dear God ~~ Thank You merciful and loving Father for all Your blessings.  So often I react before thinking.  Thank You that Your Word teaches how I should react.  Please help me respond in a way that pleases You in every situation.  Please help me to bless others every time I interact with other people so that they will see Jesus shining through.  In Jesus name, I pray.  AMEN.

Now It’s Your Turn

Thoughts?  Questions?  Want to share your story?  Ask for prayer? Please share in the comments section.

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51 comments :

  1. Thank you Carley, I needed this today

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    1. Wonderful! I'm so happy that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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    2. I needed this today too. Thank you

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    3. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  2. Thanks for sharing

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  3. Replies
    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  4. I struggle with which way to pay people back alot, i've always had quite a temper :( Thank you for reminding me how God wants us to react and for sharing that verse, I haven't seen that one before. Thank you

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    1. I'm so happy that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  5. Thanks Carley, we all need to see God's Word all of the time (Everyday) in order to live as He (God) would have us to live. Thank you so much.

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  6. Carley I think sometimes you are in my brain! LOL I can get riled up and defensive sometimes and your blog is just what I needed to see and hear. I've been working exactly on this topic for a few years. Doing much better and learning it can be done with the Lord's help!
    Stop
    Hugs

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    1. I'm so happy that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  7. Sometimes I do fly off a bit, but the Holy Spirit will convict me.

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  8. SWEETMAGNOLIA2February 06, 2014

    Well said!

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  9. The only one of those that I sorta respond to is the telemarketer. When they pause, supposedly for me to answer them, I say "goodbye" and hang up. If they are talking too fast with no pause, I also say "goodbye" and hang up. I have yet to have one of them call back. I do feel sorry for them even though they are being obnoxious, since I know that they have a terrible job and must be desperate to consider doing such a thing.

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  10. The first reaction is to become angry, however, I prefer not to give anyone control over my emotions. Now, I take a deep breathe and know that God is in control and take account of my actions as for everything there is a reason and a season!

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  11. Replies
    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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    2. Yes, Carley, it was definitely a blessing!

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    3. Thanks for letting me know that. It blesses me in return when know my work has indeed helped others. Many blessings. HUGS

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  12. 123ELAINE456February 07, 2014

    Awesome Blog!!! This is Food for Thought. Enjoyed the article very much. Thank You.

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  13. I try to remember that most people - even when it appears that they are being mean - are doing the best they can with who they are, what they know, and with the resources they have. Thus, I try to respond in a kind, nonjudgmental way. Having said that, I am not perfect or a saint - I don't always respond that way, but I typically apologize when I have a knee-jerk reaction or total meltdown.

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    1. Wow. That's a wonderful attitude to have. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  14. Thanks, I really needed to read this today!

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  15. I TRY NOT TO PAY OTHERS BACK. I PREFER TO PAY IT FORWARD. AND IF SOMEONE REALLY HURTS MY FEELINGS OR IS RUDE TO ME, I "KILL THEM WITH KINDNESS" AND IT ALMOST ALWAYS BRINGS ME AN APOLOGY. EXAMPLE: I WORKED WITH A LADY THAT TRIED TO GET ME FIRED HER VERY FIRST DAY ON THE JOB. I WAS SHOCKED! TWO DAYS LATER SHE WAS IN A CAR ACCIDENT. I SENT HER A GET WELL CARD EVERY SINGLE DAY THAT SHE WAS GONE. TO THIS DAY, WE ARE GOOD FRIENDS.

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    1. Wow. That's a wonderful attitude to have. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  16. I just read your Blog today for the first time, it was one that I need to remind myself of. I enjoyed it.

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    1. I am glad it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  17. I really enjoy this kind of question because it reminds me of what I am trying to model in my life - so that God's love shines through me rather than me blocking His love from shining to others.

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    1. I hope that it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  18. Its messages like these that make me realise just how much I need God in my life. Thank you so much for this. I have had been in that awful place and called names because I was angry and frustrated. I actually told someone off for being nice, when it is that person who is being used and I was angry for her. She is an angel and I am nowhere as good as her. Thank you for teaching me a lesson.

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    1. I am glad it blessed you. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  19. "Lord forgive me in receiving joy for their sins"

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    1. AMEN. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  20. I loved your blog about repaying others back. It does give you a great feeling inside when you don't turn around and have the same reaction when someone hurts you. :-)

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    1. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  21. God bless you I enjoyed this and it is true you have to hold on to what God has placed in you. and bless the other person for we must show love and bless those who curse us or shame us. when we do this God in turn bless us. AR

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    1. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  22. Living with a person with dementia teaches you tolerance potions keeping your cool

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    1. Thank you so much for reading and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  23. most of the time, I start to get angry, but then I stop, say "Say What???" and take a deep breath, let it out and wonder if the other person is having a bad day and just lashing out at any and everyone. Often times it isn't personal. I will usually lift up a silent prayer for God to help that person.

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    1. Thank you so much for reading, sharing, and for the reply. I appreciate it so much! HUGS

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  24. When people show kindness, I love to write about it, and give them a copy.
    Most of the time, people do not realize just how powerful their actions are

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