Saturday, January 25, 2014

Did You Hear the Latest News?!

~~ Ephesians 4:29 (NIV) ~~  Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.



Photo Credit: MS Office Copyright Free Images
by Carley Cooper 

Gossip!  It’s wrong.  It hurts people.  God said not to do it.  But, it’s so much fun to do!  Resisting it, for a lot of people, means a big spiritual struggle inside.  Some justify it by saying things such as:
  • I’m not gossiping, I’m networking
  • I’m not gossiping, I’m just telling my friend about this guy I know that...
  • I’m not gossiping, I’m just asking my friend to pray for my family member who...
  • I’m not gossiping, I’m just making an observation about a co-worker.
“How Could You Say Such a Thing?”
A friend, who runs his own business, wrote a status message online saying “When you make collections calls its uncanny how often people were just talking about their bill and realized it was overdue.”  It’s a simple observation about humanity in the circumstances of owing money.  No names were mentioned.  No financial situations were described.  No private or personal information about the company or the customers was brought up.  

The response that was given in the following comments was very negative, saying that the message was inappropriate for a public forum because it’s a private matter.  My heart went out to all of them.  I felt bad for the person who wrote the status, because he had to endure the feedback.  I felt even worse for the person who left negative comments because I realized that after a lifetime of knowing this person she hasn’t changed or grown in Christ in the least.  She has a long history of being very negative toward other people all the time. 

God Loves Positive Thinkers
To be honest my first thought was “Would it really kill her to say something nice for once?”  Then, my next instinct was to run and tell a mutual friend about it.  But, I resisted.  It was a very difficult 20 minutes, as I visited with my friend.  It took everything I had to ‘bite my tongue’.  But, I did resist because it’s not right to gossip, and because I didn’t want to stoop to the levels of the negative response.  Maybe I noticed this and my feelings were so deep because of how hard I worked myself for several years to change my own thinking patterns from negative to positive.  I tend to notice negativity more now. 

God Loves Those Who Help Others
There are many bible verses that tell us about gossip and slander, and how we should conduct ourselves.   Neither the gossip nor the negative talk is right with God.   He told us in Ephesians 4:29Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”  Jesus is our example of how we should respond and interact with other people.  He never talked about others behind their backs. He certainly didn’t put anyone down.  He only built others up by teaching them.

I didn’t gossip about these people, when I certainly could have, and even wanted to.  I could have even injected myself into their conversation and told them exactly how I felt; but I didn’t.  I thought about God, and how He would want me to react.  The proper comeback to the status message, if the responding person felt so strongly about it would have been to send a private message; and even then she should have said things to help and build up, not tear down.  Her response to the message was more inappropriate than the status she was commenting on as being unsuitable. 

The next time you’re standing around the water cooler at work, and someone says “Did you hear the latest news?!”, how are you going to respond?  I think Thumper in the 1942 Walt Disney movie Bambi said it best “"If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all."

Let’s Pray
 ~~ Dear God ~~ Graceful, merciful, and loving Father; sometimes our mouths work faster than our brains can keep up.  We speak and act before we think.  We talk about others, without giving a second thought to how You would have us deal with a situation.  Thank You for being patient with me as I try to become more like Jesus.  Thank You for molding me to be like Him.  Please help me to always help others in how I act, think, and speak.  Help me, also, to keep my thinking positive so that I can reflect Jesus to those who need to see it the most.  In Jesus name I pray, AMEN.

Now It’s Your Turn
Thoughts?  Questions?  Want to share your story?  Ask for prayer?  Please consider sharing in the comments section; even if the link you clicked to get here was on another site(If you’re on the homepage, click on the post headline, and scroll down to find the comments section.)

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57 comments:

  1. Enjoy reading your journey

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    1. Thanks Joyce. I hope it blesses you. Hug.

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    1. Glad you liked it Lorraine. Thank you for reading it, and I hope it blessed you. HUG

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  3. If you can not say anything Good say nothing at all

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    1. You are so right. It seems that most people agree with this statement, yet most people don't put it into practice. The best we can do is pray for those people, and try to be an example. Many blessings to you. HUGS

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  4. So true - many need to learn to think before they share the "latest news"

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    1. The best we can do is pray for those people, and try to be an example. Many blessings to you. HUGS

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  5. Great blog!
    I am much better about speaking negatively about other people because when I do, I really feel bad about it.

    My pastor has been talking a lot about speaking life in other people's life and that is what I try to do now.
    Well said!

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    1. Thank you so much. I like the way you put that "speaking life in other people's life". I'm glad you enjoyed it. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  6. Thanks for sharing

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    1. Thank you. I hope you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUGS

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  7. DITZYMUDGIRLJanuary 25, 2014

    I had to stop myself the other day b/c I thought "is this helpful or kind?" no, it was gossip, so I stopped even though I wanted to share! It's hard, but we just have to THINK!

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    1. Good for you. Thanks for reading my blog. I hope you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUGS

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  8. AURORADAWN5January 25, 2014

    It's so easy to give in, particularly when the details are really juicy, but sharing personal details about someone else's life can be hurtful, even when it's the truth, not to mention the half-truths and outright untruths that are the stock in trade of gossip.
    Like the old telephone tree, each person who resists can prevent that hurt from spreading to many, many others.
    God bless.

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    1. Thank you so very much for reading. You are so right. Thanks for your input. Many blessings to you and your loved ones. HUG

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  9. Wow, Carley, your blog has really come a long way! It's very nice. I really appreciated what you had to say in this post. You were spot on! Thanks for sharing it with us.

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    1. Thank you so very, very much for your input. It really does mean so much to me to hear that. I hope you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUGS

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  10. The Lord has been speaking to me about this very issue! While I have always believed that I didn't gossip, He has showed me an area where I do share opinions about a family member with my best friend. I recently became convicted about it and felt like the Lord was asking me to change my behavior..something hard since is has became habit. Thank you for this wisdom! Be blessed...

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    1. Thank you so much. I'm glad you could relate to it. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  11. Call them out on it. Tell them to pray for that person.
    And yes, I've done it before.

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    1. Thank you for reading. I hope you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  12. COMIC_BOOK_MAMAJanuary 25, 2014

    Thank you for this! I've been fighting this particular demon today and this was a great reminder.

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    1. Thank you for your feedback, and for reading. I'm happy that you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  13. Just read your blog about gossip (linked from Spark) Awesome read

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    1. Thank you for your feedback, and for reading. I hope that you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUG

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    2. I was blessed.

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    3. Thank you for telling me that. It really means a lot to me. HUG

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  14. WINNIE-POOHJanuary 25, 2014

    Awesome! Hugs

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    1. Thank you for your feedback, and for reading. I hope that you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  15. nformation when shared with another becomes so misconstrued and sometime, you become the bad guy/girl. Yield not to temptation and this information, on many occasions is not yours to share! Point made! what if it were you?!?!?

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    1. Thank you for your feedback, and for reading. I hope that you were blessed by it. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  16. I don't like people who gossip as I have had it happen to me too many times and it has ruined my life. Unfortunately I work somewhere where gossip runs rampant and already something about me, which is the truth is already spread about me and it came back to me.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing. Sorry to hear about your perils with gossip. The best we can do is to pray about it, and try to be an example. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  17. Unfortunately I hurt some people when I was younger by gossiping. I've learned my lesson and don't do it and stop it when someone else wants to tell me something I know is gossip. I love the reaction when you tell someone," Oh that's not my business, please don't discuss it with me." They get flustered and try to defend themselves which shows they felt guilty before they started talking. We need to train our children young not to gossip. Thank you for the blog Carley.

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing. It sounds like you have a good grip on the gossip habit. Good for you! You are a great example to show God's glory. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  18. thank you for sharing this

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    1. You are so welcome. Thank you for reading it. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  19. HABITATVITALITYJanuary 26, 2014

    Gossip can sometimes disguise itself as 'concern' but the two are completely different so you'll know what it is when you hear it - if you are listening for it.

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  20. HABITATVITALITYJanuary 26, 2014

    Great insight Carley - between gossip and judgement the path does get very narrow in how we can actually behave. Love the number of followers you are getting also. I'd comment but I'm not linked to anything to be able to comment and I'm not signing up to anything either LOL

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    1. Thank you so much for reading, and for the feedback. You don't need to sign up to be able to make a comment. Just write your comment in the comment box. Click on the down arrow next to 'Reply as:'. Then choose 'Name/URL'. Then fill in your name, but leave the URL space blank. Click 'Continue', then click 'Publish'. Voila! Comment done! :-)

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  21. I agree. Gossip is as much a sin as most any other sin. Yet it is one of the most difficult sins for most people to recognize while they're in it. We should run away from gossip.

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    1. Thank you for reading it. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  22. IGNITEME101January 26, 2014

    amen! Gossip hurts all involved~

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    1. hank you for reading it. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  23. gossip hurts-

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    1. Thank you for reading it. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  24. DAWNDMOORE40January 26, 2014

    Thank you for sharing sparkycarley! This is something I definitely need to work on!

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    1. Thank you for reading it. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  25. DADDYS_GIRL6January 27, 2014

    Carley thanks for sharing. I have learned it is easier to avoid to find other things to be ready to share. Gossip does hurt others and the one spreading it too, in the long run.

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    1. Thank you for reading it. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  26. I only got a chance to read a little bit on your blog (too bad, looks like there's some great stuff there). The whole negative comment thing (social networks-online) is positively unreal! It can be so damaging. For some reason people really seam to believe these comments.
    Cheri

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    1. Thank you for reading as much as you were able to. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  27. Amen I agree . We are not to get involved

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    1. Thank you for reading it. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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  28. I usually ignore gossip. Can't stand the way people spread it!

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    1. Thank you for reading it. I hope it blessed you. Many blessings to you. HUG

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